A divorced mom tells Amy she has been talking to her boyfriend of two years about marriage. But recently he revealed he has a lot of debt and no plan to pay it off. Now what?

Do not marry, comingle your finances or bail him out. He needs to demonstrate a concerted commitment to clear this debt on his own. He is an adult single man with no people to support. He could clear this in under two years, but it would require that he make some big changes.

Dear Amy: I am a divorced mom in my early-30s, with primary custody of my 8-year-old child. I have been dating “Ben” for the past two years. He is a great guy and he is very good with my son. We have been talking about getting married. He has never been married before (no kids) and I am gun-shy, to say the least.

He said the debt came from purchasing a car and more recently from a ski vacation he went on with some friends. I feel extremely uncomfortable now. I am wondering if Ben expects me to clear his debt by using some of the equity on my house.

We have been talking about getting married. He has never been married before (no kids), and I am gun-shy, to say the least. I own my home, my son is happy, and I am trying to be extremely careful about our future.

"We have been talking about getting married. He has never been married before (no kids) and I am gun-shy, to say the least."

I am a divorced mom in my early-30’s, with primary custody of my 8-year-old child. I have been dating “Ben” for the past two years. He is a great guy and he is very good with my son. We have been talking about getting married.